Sometimes We Unknowingly Set Ourselves Up To Get Hurt

Like When We Date Unavailable Men

This question may sound odd to you, however, it is something for you to think about. How often do we as women, set ourselves up to get hurt emotionally? Because some situations are avoidable but we have to take a pause before stepping off the cliff.

I recognize that when we get romantically involved, there is always going to be a certain amount of risk. However, the following situations that some women find themselves in don’t have to happen. For example:

When you decide to date unavailable men, what are you doing? Setting yourself up to be hurt. When you sleep with men that never spend any money on you, never take you anywhere, or don’t introduce you to their friends, what are you doing? Setting yourself up to be hurt.

When you have unprotected sex without either of you being tested, what are you doing? Setting yourself up to be hurt. And when you have unprotected sex with a man you don’t really know and who may get you pregnant, what are you doing? Setting yourself up to be hurt.

Tips for NOT setting yourself up to get your Feelings HURT:

1. Love yourself MORE than you love a Man.

• This means you DO NOT allow a MAN to treat you any less than you deserve.
• And if that means you have to walk away, then you walk away. This means you need to check in with your self-esteem before getting involved.

2. Know you have the RIGHT and DUTY (to yourself) to say NO.

• “NO” to unprotected sex without a serious commitment; “NO” to sex with a Married or spoken-for Man and “NO” to Men who will not get tested for all Sexual Transmitted Diseases.
• If he gets angry and threatens to move on, LET HIM GO.
• Remember, you are not a man, which means having sex like one will damage your self-esteem, and when you wake up to assess your choices you may have a lot of negative feelings.
• Some men want to have sex with minimal effort and if you allow this, some of them will think less of you in the morning; that is if he even spends the night. When a man meets a woman, he determines how much effort/money it will take before she will allow him to sleep with her.
• A woman who stands her ground will receive much more respect, and if he wants to be with you, he will make a commitment to you because that is what you deserve.
• When a man meets a woman, he determines how much effort/money it will take before she will allow him to sleep with her.
• A woman who stands her ground will receive much more respect, and if he wants to be with you, he will make a commitment to you because that is what you deserve.

4. Do not let Men take advantage of you. SINGLEHOOD or loneliness is NOT a reason to allow Men to take advantage of you.

• If you are feeling vulnerable, stay away from men until you have regained your center and you feel calmer and more self-assured.

5. Regain confidence and trust in your Intuition.

• If you don’t trust your instincts or your INTUITION because you recently got your feelings hurt when you chose the wrong man, then give yourself a BREAK from dating until you have figured out why he was a poor choice and why you didn’t listen to your inner voice.
• Go over in your mind and see what signs you may have ignored. It’s okay to make mistakes but learning from them is the real key and being honest with yourself, it’s not about giving up instead of getting help when you need it.

It’s your body treat it well and it will repay you, treat it poorly and it will have a hard time forgiving you.

I know it’s tough being alone, however, it’s even tougher when you choose the Wrong Man and then allow him to treat you badly because you don’t want to be alone. This is desperate dating behavior.

Self-Confidence, Self-Respect, and Self-Worth are important feelings to have for yourself because they help to protect you and prevent other people from mistreating you. So if you are deficient in these areas, begin working on cultivating them TODAY. They will help save you a great deal of heartache in the future.