Women, unknowingly do things all the time that makes them lonely, maybe you are familiar with one or more of these behaviors.
I’ve definitely experienced being a few of these women in many different situations throughout my lifetime.
1. Ms. Controller – Telling him what he can and can not do. But, you probably don’t appreciate being told what to do.
- Ask yourself what is causing your need to control him.
- Do you trust him? If not, why not?
- Do you respect him? If not, why not?
- How does he make you feel when you are with him?
Behavior cannot be changed if you don’t understand why you behave in a certain way.
2. The Nagger – Complaining about the same things over and over again. If he’s doing the same things that he was doing when you met him he probably won’t change unless he wants to.
- How does Nagging make you feel? Tired? Frustrated?
- Does it work? If it works, how long does it take?
- How does he treat you afterward?
- Do you like the way he treats you afterward?
- Do you achieve your desired result and at what cost?
3. The Put Down Specialist – Yelling and saying mean/nasty or disrespectful things to hurt people when you are angry.
- Some women do this to their children but once you’ve said it you can’t take it back.
- This can leave scars that will remain with them throughout their lives and could come back to bite you.
- Maybe your mother treated you this way and you’re paying it forward but you don’t have to.
- It can damage any relationship over time and the behavior can pass on to your children.
4. The Punisher – Withholding love from another person whether it be romantic, friendship, or motherly.
- Using love as a weapon to be wielded in any direction isn’t cool.
- If you do this too much it will make the other person numb eventually.
- This will also teach others how to withhold love from you.
5. The Tolerator – Allowing people to do things that make you upset but always letting it go.
- Friends who treat you in ways that make you feel bad about yourself.
- Dating men who put you down and you don’t stand up for yourself.
- Coworkers that try to make you do everything and you let them get away with it.
6. Ms. Passive Aggressive – Doing things to get back at him when he is not aware of what he’s done wrong.
- Most women are probably guilty of this one because sometimes communicating your feelings makes you feel too vulnerable.
- Some women also do this to their children when they’re upset with their father it’s very damaging to children’s self-esteem.
- Over-reacting by punishing your children because you are mad at something else or someone else, in the future you may forget but they won’t.
7. The Settler – He’s not the right man but you keep dealing with him because it’s better than being alone. Unfortunately, once you settle for one thing you’ll settle for everything. It’s a habit that is hard to break, I’ve struggled with this unknowingly my entire life.
- Chances are you dislike something in your life, job, body, etc.
- Settling creates a ghost-like life where you just float without direction on autopilot.
- The first way to start to change this is to recognize that this is what you’ve been doing.
8. The Pleaser – Does whatever makes him or others happy, and constantly forgives him for whatever he does.
- This is a definite sign of low self-esteem, and people will treat you the way you allow them to treat you.
- If it takes a lot for you to say “no” then it’s time to understand its power and its ability to change your life for the better.
- It’s okay to take care of you and you deserve it!
9. The Horder – It’s hard to stop thinking about what you had but try instead to think about what YOU have right now.
- If you don’t learn to release pain, anger, and physical things it may cause you to lose control over your life.
- The more you hold onto things the tougher your life will be because it’s a constant reminder of what didn’t work in your life.
10. The Victim – The recording in your head keeps saying “why do these things always happen to me.” This used to be my mantra.
- A woman’s life is the sum of her choices so if you don’t own them then you can’t change them.
- There is always someone else that can take the fall for your life if you choose to think that way.
- Remember, you have the power to try something new, that is if you want something new to happen.
11. The Unforgiver – This is when you can’t forgive those who have done you wrong because they don’t deserve it.
- If you don’t forgive them and release the pain how will you ever be at peace?
- If you don’t release the past it can grow in your body like a virus and mutate into something worse.
- Forgiveness is not about them, and in some cases, they probably don’t know you’re mad at them, therefore, they won’t know you forgave them.
12. The Professional – If you feel men are intimated by you and this is the reason you’re alone.
- Maybe you have put your femininity in storage because you feel you need to compete with men at work and at home.
- Try taking some time to connect with your feminine side by having a spa retreat because pampering will bring out your passive side, the side that is aware of your feelings.
- Connecting with your feelings will allow you to understand yourself better so your feminine side can emerge when you meet a man that is right for you.
13. Ms. Unhealthy – If you don’t take care of yourself then you’ll have low energy and health problems, and you may also feel unhappy about yourself in general and that is not attractive to most guys.
- Unfortunately, most men judge women by their appearance but women do the same thing to men.
- Think about it this way do you want to date a man that doesn’t take of himself and then gets sick?
14. Ms. Pushover – Allowing people or men to treat you poorly won’t make them fall for you instead it’s a turn-off for most men. Remember, you have more POWER than you think.
- It’s a sign of low self-esteem but confidence looks sexy on everyone.
- Some men might think you are easy prey for other men to manipulate.
- Some people might pretend to like you in order to use you so beware.
15. Ms. Masculine – There’s nothing wrong with being a little on the aggressive side but you have read the clues that a man is given before you approach.
- If he’s very masculine then like energy repels each other so you may need a man who has more passive energy.
- Or you can decide to try some femininity on for size and see how it works for you.
- Just know that you may have to push yourself to try something different if what you have been doing is not working.
Self-awareness is the key to having a better relationship first with yourself and then with others but you have to open up to look inside of yourself.
Check my relationship documentary for more tips to change your life for the better so you can have a life you love.