Are You Too Negative?- How To Stop Being Negative

Being Too Negative Creates Negative Energy In Your Life

Maybe you are not Too Negative but I bet you know a lot of people who are.

Today we live in a world that is full of negative and damaging messages, images, and talk, with the majority of it coming from the media.

All you have to do is turn on the TV or pick up a newspaper to find out. However, on a more personal level, we experience negativity in our own lives due to our circumstances and situations, and those of our family and friends.

So with that said, it can be difficult to avoid participating in all the heavy drama that surrounds us daily. When we talk to our co-workers, friends, and family, we may unconsciously engage in negative & pessimistic conversations about our life or the lives of others.

Some of us can’t help it because we’ve been participating in this type of behavior since we were teenagers or even children.

  • Why? Because we learned it from the people around us who continually complained about their lives or talked badly about people their envious of or people they feel are beneath them.
  • Even worse some spread racism, sexism, and other nastiness about people they never even met. 
  • Why do some people act this way?
  • Do you act this way? If so, why?
  • Is it to make themselves feel better about who they are, how smart they are, how they look, etc?

When you grow up with that kind of unconscious teaching, it can be a challenge to begin looking at life in a more positive and supportive light.

When we talk about others we are focusing on them instead of ourselves. When we want to give people advice on how to make their lives better or tell them what they should and should not be doing, we are again focusing on them rather than our own personal issues and challenges.

Not only is it a controlling attitude, but it’s also a good way of ignoring your own issues and cleaning up your own life. If the advice you’re giving to someone else is so good 

then keep it for yourself and utilize it. If someone asks for advice give it, but sometimes it’s better to give kind words for support and encouragement to someone that is struggling with a stressful situation.

Tips to Stop Being Too Negative:

1. Stop watching the news all the time.

  • Are you getting down or depressed because you are watching and reading about the terrible things that are happening in the world daily?
  • Can you control those things? No. Are they affecting your life in a Negative Way? Possibly.
  • All those damaging news stories may actually affect your mood and outlook on life without you knowing it, so take a break for a week and see how you feel.

2. Pay close attention to the conversations you start or engage in.

  • If they take a pessimistic or negative turn, pull back or change the subject to something positive.
  • This includes gossiping about other people.
  • If you’re people who spend all their time complaining about life, here’s a suggestion: tell them you’re going to give them 5 minutes to vent and then move on to another subject.
  • If they don’t like that, then it may be time for you to limit your exposure to them.
  • Don’t be afraid to protect yourself from the influence of others, people can drag you into their chaos in order not to be alone.
  • In some cases, friends and family members can be envious of things about you and try to sabotage your successes so be aware of those types of people exist in your world.
  • Learn from others’ lessons so you avoid making the same mistakes. 

3. Pay attention to jealous emotions for other people’s lives.

  • If there are people you are envious of asking yourself why and will feeling this way actually changes anything in your life? Instead of feeling envious be happy for others’ accomplishments and see what you can learn from them; who knows where they may take you in your own life or what it might attract.
  • Good things come to those with good thoughts.

4. Stop participating in the drama talk.

  • Think about not feeding into your girlfriend’s negative talk about her Man or her life.
  • Learn to stay neutral or play the “devil’s advocate” because this may open her eyes to her own negative behaviors. And remember: you’re only getting her side of the story and it may not all be true.
  • It’s unfair to judge a person when the other person is not there to defend their self against what is being said.
  • Also, remember factual events of a situation are different than the feelings a person has about them.  So if she tells you about an event that took place that had a negative impact on her that is okay. As a friend, you can give her supportive ways to deal with her feelings and help her move on. Sometimes, we can stay stuck, and that can affect our lives in dangerous ways.

5. If people don’t ask for your advice, keep it to yourself.

  • Pay attention to when you give people unsolicited advice.
  • People will often get resentful when you offer your opinion and they didn’t ask for it. If they do happen to ask you, make sure it’s not negative, it’s in their best interest, and not contrary to how you live your own life. Continually telling people to do things that you don’t do, makes people rethink their relationship with you. 
  • Believe that they have the ability to know what is best for them and that they will figure it out eventually. Always give support and encouragement. To think anything less of them is to strip them of their right to learn a lesson, and to be empowered.

I realized this task may be a challenge for many of you because we’re so unconsciously programmed to engage. However, becoming aware of how many negative messages are around and how they are affecting and impacting both your mood and your choices is essential for clearing unnecessary negativity from your life.

Gossiping is the ultimate negative talk so you must decide how you show up in the world. We aren’t perfect nor will we ever be, but I suggest you take a moment to think about your words before you share them with others. Once those words are out into the world, there is no turning back, and they can ruin a relationship, friendship, and marriage.

This is your life and you have the power to change anything you want; the choice is always yours to make.

Have you ever felt this way or were you the one that betrayed your friend?