Discover Grow Love

Self-Reflection & Personal Growth Platform

The Pledges Of Love

Self Esteem Pledges

Below are some pledges you can use to say every day. You can do these in your mirror exercises. Pick a pledge you like, use them all, or better yet, makeup one of your own! If you really want to make this powerful, pick a girlfriend that you truly trust and ask her to say the pledges with you. Be sure to fill in your name in all the blank spaces. There is a copy suitable for framing in the Appendix.

“I, ___________________, pledge to love myself first before I can love anyone else. I promise to treat myself well by taking good care of my body, mind, and spirit. I promise to protect my body from harm by refusing to have sex without commitment and practicing safe sex by consistently and carefully, using protection.”
I, __________________, pledge to love myself first before I can love anyone else. I choose to honor and respect myself by refusing to let men treat me in ways that are demeaning and disrespectful to women.
I, __________________, pledge to love and nurture myself through compassionate self-care. I will teach others how to treat me by treating them the way I wish to be treated. I KNOW I deserve the best and refuse to settle for anything less.
I_________________, pledge to honor and respect my most precious commodity by refraining from giving it to a man that has not committed to me in a monogamous relationship. I choose to abstain from having unprotected sex with a Man who fails or refuses to treat me with the respect I deserve.

I____________________, pledge to abstain from having unprotected SEX with a Man until both of us have been tested for all STD’s, including HIV. I will abstain from having unprotected SEX until I see the results of those tests.
I, ___________________, pledge to love myself and give to myself first. Once my needs are met, I am able to give myself to others. I refuse to let people take advantage of me or use me in any way no matter who they are. This includes family and close friends.

Don’t do this to yourself, it will hurt your self-esteem and confidence and can leave you with a negative attitude about men. Watch below:


These pledges or promises are important because you are connecting with yourself in ways that you may not have done before. You are making a commitment to yourself and that is not something to be taken lightly.

Breaking promises to yourself will have long-reaching consequences, which will include the weight of the inner knowledge that you cannot trust yourself to keep your own word.

When saying the pledges, you will probably be uncomfortable at first however over time you will hopefully find yourself starting to actually believe what you are saying in the mirror.

 When you feel yourself slipping in ways that you will ultimately regret, you can pull out your phone and record yourself saying the pledges then you can play it back whenever you need reinforcement. 

The pledges will remind you of your self-worth and what you deserve as a beautiful, powerful, self-assured woman. Part of believing what you say in the mirror will be more powerful now that you have evaluated the CHOICES you’ve made in your previous relationships or encounters with MEN that lead you to be a DESPERATE DATER. Remember: how can a man keep a commitment to you if you cannot keep a commitment you made to yourself?

Source: Love, Forgiveness, Career, Happiness – 12 Step Journey to Creating an Amazing Life